Walking Home

A couple of friends asked me how it takes 40 minutes to walk home from nursery with my daughters at the end of the day, when nursery is five minutes away.  Here’s how …

Isla, come out from behind the shed please, we’re going.  Careful!  Okay, that’s not helpful, now Wynn will want to copy you and it’s not safe.  Never mind.  Please just come.  Okay, Isla, the gate is open; we’re going … that’s it, thank you – no Wynn, stop, wait, wait … WAIT.  Good girl.  This is a fast road, we need to cross it all together. 

Okay.   Isla, please can you hold your book bag; I’ll hold your scooter.  Wynn, please hold the handle of your scooter with me.  Okay, we’re crossing.  ISLA!  You need to concentrate!  We missed that chance and now we need to wait.  You need to be ready the whole time.  Wynn!  Hold on to the scooter please.  WYNN!  Okay, I’ll carry you across the – yes, you can ride your scooter, but only after we’ve crossed the road.  Alright.  Isla, hold – just be ready to cross the road.  No, I can’t hold your hand, I haven’t got enough hands.  Look, there’s a space in a moment.  Are you ready?  Isla? 

Okay, let’s go.

That’s it, well done.  Alright.  Wynn, would you like to ride your scooter?  Okay, let’s put your helmet on.  You too, Isla.  You don’t want to?  Okay, but you’ll need to push it.  There you go, Wynn, are you ready to scoot?  No, I don’t need to hold the strap because it’s uphill and I can keep up with you.  You don’t want to scoot?  Okay, fine, I’ll carry your scooter.  No, I can’t carry yours too Isla, I haven’t got enough hands.  Ok.  Come on Wynn, you can hold this hand.  Shall we go?  Look it’s not far to the estate.  Isla!  Are you coming?  Come on please, let’s just keep going my love.  Alright, I’ll carry your scooter.  But you need to carry your book bag.  I know you’re tired.  Let’s put Wynn’s scooter on top of yours.  There we go.

Come on, you two.  So, Isla, did you have a good day at school?  What was your best thing today?  Can’t remember?  Well … what did you have for lunch?  Did you play inside or outside?  Wynn – come away from the edge of the road.  You want your cuddly?  Can’t we wait until we’re in the estate?  Okay, okay, I’ll get her.  I just need to put the scooters down, and the bags.  Hang on.  Isla, can you hold the nursery bag, just for a minute?  Here you are Wynn.  You need to be on my other hand – alright, let’s switch hands.  Okay, let’s go; come on, we’re nearly at the estate. 

Come on Isla!  You need a wee?  Couldn’t you have gone at nursery?  Okay, well we’re not going back now – you’ll have to do a wild wee on the estate, but we’ve got to stop doing this.  You’re too big.

Come ON!  You said you needed a wee!  Well, hurry up then!  I know you’re tired.  Look it’s not far to get home.  Let’s just keep going, and then we can all have a rest. 

Okay, here’s the estate.  Isla, do you want to go behind those bushes, and have your wee?  Find a discreet place – no, not there, it’s too near someone’s window.  Can you go in the bushes?  Yes, that’s better.  Hey Wynn, look – here’s Tony on his lawnmower, say hello!  Sorry, Tony – look this way, I’m afraid there’s a wild wee going on.  I know – sorry to embarrass you!  Wynn, say hi!  Sorry Tony, we’re having a shy day.

Okay, Isla, done? Come on then, let’s go.  Say goodbye to Tony.  Wynn, do you want to scoot?  Okay, why don’t you both scoot down here?  Oopsy daisy!  You’re alright – up you get.  Let’s have a look.  Is it your hands?  Okay, let’s give them a kiss.  They’ll be alright.  Okay, I’ll carry the scooter.

Isla, if you’re walking on the wall, be careful.  Wynn, you want to, too?  Okay, but wait for me – WAIT!  You need to hold my hand.  Isla, look where you’re going!  Alright Wynn, careful does it.  That’s it.  And – jump down!  There we go.  Let me just get the scooters.  Why am I holding everything?  Isla, can you carry your book bag at least, please?  And wrap your jumper round your waist.  Thank you.  That’s better.  Okay – Isla, can you carry your scooter up the steps?

Oh, I give up!

Go on Wynn, up you go.  Go on – you can do it.  I can’t hold your hand, I’ve got the scooters.  Oh for goodness sake.  Alright – come on then.  Now, wait there – let me go back for the scooters.  Okay.  No, we can’t play hide and seek tonight – it’s too late, we need to get home.  Maybe tomorrow.

Look, there’s Yasmiin.  Isla, look up – in her window.  Give her a wave.  Hi Yasmiin!  No my love, we’re not playing out tonight, it’s too late  - I should think it’s your dinner time too.  Yes, maybe Thursday – we’ll see you later in the week, okay?  Bye!

Come on guys, let’s keep going.  Please stop at the road, Isla.  I know it’s only a little road but it’s a good place to practice.

Well done.  Come on then, let’s cross.  You want to go on this wall as well?  Okay, up you get then.  Sorry Wynn, what’s the matter?  I lifted you up?  Well, what did you want?  Look, you’re up on the wall, please can we just walk?

Fine.  I’ll lift you down and you can climb back up.  But you have to stop crying first – it’s not safe.  What’s that, Isla?  It’s Tessa?  Oh, that’s nice.  Hold on though, I’m just dealing with Wynn.  Come on Wynn.  Look, if you don’t walk, I’ll take you down and you can stay on the pavement.  That’s it.  There we go – finally!  Hold my hands, let’s jump down. 

Look – there’s Rory and Tessa!  Say hi to Rory.  How are you, Tessa?  How’s sleep?  Oh, that sounds hard.  It will get better.  I don’t know what I did – it’s hard when they’re sharing, isn’t it?  I feel like I could be much stricter with Isla but – well, it’ll get there.  Wynn, no, don’t pick the flowers.  No, not the stones either – they need to stay in Tessa’s garden.  Wynn …

Ilsa, wait where I can see you please!  Yes, I’m coming, I’m just saying hello to Tessa.  Anyway, yes, maybe see you on Friday, if you’re around?  Oh look, Rory’s come out now, I’m so sorry!  It’s okay, I’ll get him.

Oi Rory, you rascal, you haven’t got any shoes on!  I’m … coming … to … get… you!

You can’t go out now, it’s dinner time!  Look, I need to take lsla and Wynn home.  Here you are, Tessa.  We’ll go.  Nice to see you.  Wynn, say goodbye to Rory.  Let’s go.

Now, where’s Isla?  I hope she hasn’t gone too far.  Let’s just get home.  Oh look, there’s Isla.  Well done Isla, thank you for waiting.  Nice dandelions.  No, we can’t stay and pick more, we need to get home.  You can pick some more on Friday.  Wynn, no we’re not stopping to pick flowers.  Wynn, come on both of you.  Please.  I’m going to count to three and then I’m going.  One … two … three.  Okay, I’m going.  Isla, you’ll need to pick up your book bag.

Come ON!  You two, please!  Finally.  Look, we’re nearly at the flat.

Wynn, you need a poop?  Okay, well hold on tight.  We just need to put the scooters in the shed.  No, we can’t get the ball out.  You said you needed a poop.  Yes, well let me just put the scooters … in … here.  Now, pass me the ball.  No, don’t throw it!  Ha – got it!  Now, I’m putting it away, we need to go inside.

Isla, please stop picking flowers now.  You can bring those ones up, so long as you walk up the stairs quickly.  Wynn, please come up the inside of the steps, not the outside.  No, I’m not carrying you, I’ve got two bags plus my own.  Come on, hold my hand.  Let’s count the stairs.  Where’s your cuddly?  Oh, Wynn!  Well, is she by the shed?  Look, just stay here and I’ll run and get her.  When we get inside we can have a snack.

Isla, come on please.  Okay, Isla you can do the fob and Wynn can do the key upstairs.  Quickly, please.  Wynn needs a poop.

Okay.  Ssh – quietly, there’s lots of people living here.  Isla, if you run around, Wynn follows you.  Come on both of you – UP the stairs.  Please!  Okay, I’m going up.  Come on then.

Alright, I’ll come back down and hold your hand Wynn, but you must walk normally - no swinging.  Come on.  Wynn.  This is your last warning – one step at a time please.  WYNN!  Okay, no I can’t hold your hand because it’s not safe. You’ll have to come up by yourself.  Okay, I’ll leave you there.  Come on, Isla, Wynn will catch us up.  No, do NOT drop your book bag over the railing - it could land on someone’s head.  I know there’s no-one there now, but someone could come in at any point.  Anyway, it teaches Wynn to do it and it’s not safe. 

Wynn, are you coming?  Okay, stop crying, and walk up.  I’ll wait here.  No, I’m not coming down.  I tell you what, if you walk up that flight, I’ll wait, and I’ll carry you up the next two flights.  Come on then.  Alright, I’m waiting. 

There we go.  Okay, please can you walk up two steps, then it’s easier to lift you with one arm.  That’s it.  Okay.  Isla, can you speed up please?  I can’t hold Wynn for long – I need to get up the stairs.  Keep going, please!  Okay, one more flight, that’s it.  Yes, you can have a snack when you get in but I need to sit down for a moment.  Nearly there. 

That’s it, there we go.  Okay, Wynn, do you want to help with the key?  Yes, push it in, turn it.  That’s it!  Please take your shoes off girls.  Yes, you can have a snack, but let me sit down first.  Oh Wynn, yes, you need a poop – well DONE for waiting!  Just a second …